Taking the Kingdom of Heaven by force...

There is no other time like Lent to remind one just how pitched a battle we are in for the salvation of our souls.

Observing Lent as an Orthodox Christian is a far cry from when I first got introduced to it as a Lutheran or even when I got re-introduced to it as an Evangelical Protestant (though I don't doubt God used this as a seed to lead me to the Orthodox Church). Fasting for me was giving up an item (I actually gave up chocolate one year - ooOOOoooimpressiveNOT!), going to the Lenten services (preceded by the soup dinner at the Lutheran church....oh, the irony years later!) and essentially learning to take Christ's Passion & Resurrection a little more seriously than I had the first 15-ish years of my life.

To my former Lutheran church's credit (and the pastor in charge at the time), there is still no service to this day that impacts me more than the Maundy Thursday service and the stripping of the altar that places us at the betrayal, arrest, trial etc. of Christ. Even though I can no longer participate in the stripping of the altar at my Western rite parish I can't go through the service dry-eyed as it's made painfully aware to me that it's *my* sin that Christ voluntarily went through His Passion & Death for as Psalm 21 (Septuagint) is chanted while the altar is stripped.

As an Orthodox Christian I've found Lent to be an entirely different ballgame. Fasting actually means giving up amounts of food, but that isn't the centerpiece of observing Lent (as it was when I was Lutheran), rather it's moreso about fasting from my sin. It's about seriously seeking out the needed deep-cleaning of one's soul by way of prayer (definitely lots more of that) and repentance as a heightened level of awareness as we prepare for the Feast of Feasts - Pascha.

Something that any Christian can attest to is that anytime one seeks to pursue one's Faith more, this will get the enemy's attention in a negative way and as a result earn us 'special attention' at such times as this. I remember my Spiritual Father explaining to me once that the reason those who don't follow Christ and live in the world don't have the troubles we do as Christians is because they're doing things the enemy wants them to do anyways so he doesn't bother with them. By setting ourselves up against him by our actions as Christians, we get his attention and very specifically at that.

Along with Lent this year there has been my ongoing pursuit of seeking out how to find the middle ground between the pursuit a monastic vocation while still in the world with the addition of it being Lent. On the one hand, I know I need to check myself into ICU because I'm just that much in need of the Great Physician's care. On another, I've also set myself against the enemy in a very specific way. The being at war imagery has become more pointed and vivid and always does during Lent - imagine that.

An item that is in the world that I still find very appealing are pirates & pirate lore. While an initial crush on a certain actor may have assisted in this (no, not Johnny Depp!), as I've gone about participating in various aspects of pirate-culture/lore I've found either on my own or have had pointed out to me the similarities to being a pirate & a monastic. Pirates have set themselves against the 'normal' culture of their world and seek to live life on the seas pursuing their freedom and being quite willing to fight for it if need be. Monastics also set themselves up against the 'normal' culture of the world and seek to live life on the sea that is the desert pursuing the freedom of fighting for not only their salvation but beyond that the salvation of the world. Both scratch & claw, both employ the use of swords and daggers when a fight is entered into and while looked at with scorn or derision by 'normal' society there is still a healthy level of respect for what they do.

A track of a certain soundtrack I like to listen to from time to time is aptly titled, 'What Shall We Die For?' - indeed, what shall we die for? For the Orthodox Christian seriously trying to observe Lent there is only one thing to die for: the Kingdom of Heaven. We each get to set sail - monastic or layperson - and hoist our colors against the enemy that would keep us from seeking out Christ and His Kingdom and for each of us that will be things that are exactly the same while others are very unique to us individually. The sad thing is how often I end up being my own worst enemy and like the Apostles before Christ's Resurrection cry out in fear to set things right and smooth by my standards even though He's right there with me fully aware of what's going on.

However, sometimes the storms are necessary for us to go through in order to grow and become better Christians by learning the lessons they provide. I'll admit I'm facing things now that I'd rather not, but I am becoming more aware that if I weren't ready for or in need of it I wouldn't be. I just need to make sure that I keep trusting God's ever-steady hand to guide me and be willing to keep my eyes open towards the horizon He's lovingly pointing me towards.

Yes, the enemy is going to toss maelstroms and marauders my way but I wasn't promised a luxury cruise when I signed on to serve Christ. I was called to carry a Cross and to follow Him - sometimes the path taking me places I'd never choose for myself..and sadly some of which I get taken onto kicking and screaming. Yet I'm not told to walk the plank - I'm instead waited patiently upon to give up control of the helm and learn to trust Him in a completely new way.

Yes, I'm but one sailor however I'm not alone in this journey/battle. There have been and will be storms regardless of Lent reaching its conclusion. However, by God's grace I'll be better equipped to fight the good fight towards taking the Kingdom of Heaven by force while keeping the Feast of Feasts in my heart as well.